Must A Wannabe Content Creator Pal Stop Exploiting People for Content?

One Side: One Friend's Perspective

At times she films me while having a meal. It's jarring to spot myself on her Instagram – it feels like a sudden shock.

My best friend of 10 years, Marielle, labels herself the “creativity monarch”. It’s fun for a short while, but it strains our friendship.

Being highly outgoing, there's a constant urge the need to record everything all the time. During meals out, she says, “The camera eats first,” and takes photos with bright lighting, which induces embarrassment. It's unpleasant when other people see her posing or filming – I get secondhand embarrassment. It also frustrates me because meals lose their warmth.

She's not quite an influencer yet, but she is aspiring to become one. She makes vlogs about living in our city, her daily routine, and her styling career. Her content is good, I’ll give her that, but I prefer not to be dragged into it. On occasion I'm captured while I’m eating, or just accompanying her. I’ll see myself on her Instagram later, and it pops up like a jumpscare: I’ll have bare-faced, making a strange expression or photographed while eating. It feels invasive.

She also expects me to record her at inconvenient times. Sometimes I’ll be talking to another person, or we're simply spending time in the street. I feel like our bond has turned into me being her free crew. She could easily employ someone if she wanted professional shots. Upon mentioning my discomfort about the situation, she brushed it off. I've been invited to several industry functions, which were appreciated, but that doesn't compensate for all the time and effort I invest assisting her create material.

I appreciate that Marielle has helped me with my design career, but I resist our connection to become just a ledger of exchanges. I don't believe she’s fake or dishonest, but at times I feel that if the camera is out, we will begin acting in a way that makes us look good for her vlog.

Her directive is, “Alright, smile for the camera!” and record me smiling with someone. It’s so silly. I need her to understand that our 10-year friendship still has limits. I love spending time with her, but I also want to experience it without being recorded, altered, or shared for an audience. I’m not a prop for her online persona.

The Defence: Marielle

I want my friend to see that the content we make together can get us a foot in the door.

I love creating videos. It's more than a pastime; it’s part of who I am. Creating videos and documenting experiences online enables me to show my personality and engage with people in novel forms.

I wouldn't label myself as a professional creator yet, but it's savvy to generate income from your interests. I look up to people on social platforms who pull off that style of informal, self-made film-making.

Content creation is my version of living actively: observing the details, sharing them with an audience that appreciates the craft behind it. It's never my aim to make my friend uncomfortable. Bringing her to industry events was my way of sharing opportunities, providing her a opportunity to experience behind-the-scenes moments that could benefit her career in design too. That’s not blackmail, it’s just being pragmatic.

I’d still take her to such functions even if she refused to assist me, but I desire her to see what the work we make together can achieve: an opening. I understand not everyone enjoys being filmed, but often unplanned moments is what makes content genuine. Being recorded occasionally is part and parcel of being my friend. I would delete anything she asked, but she hasn't made such a request yet.

I don’t expect anyone to be my private videographer, but companions help each other in minor capacities. I thought recording a short video here or there would be enjoyable for her. Innovation flourishes in partnership, and having my friend around makes endeavors energetic and pleasurable. I don't compel her to participate in anything, and I would never intentionally humiliate her. But filming together occasionally is part of how I record our time together.

I value our friendship deeply and want to avoid making videos to come between us. I am ready to compromise: like asking before filming, and steering clear of angles that might make her self-conscious.

This is not about power, it’s about expressing my perspective while still respecting hers. Clearly making content is not a replacement for real connection: it's merely part of how I experience life and I desire her to be included in a way that’s enjoyable for each of us.

Outside Perspectives: Public Sentiment

Should Marielle stop filming herself and Beth when they are socializing?

Nothing is more uncomfortable than having a companion point a camera at you. I understand that it's her job, but I don’t make friends come to my workplace. Perhaps she can find like-minded creators to create content with. Given the dark, looming future of AI, personal relationships are the only thing we have – cherish them!
Liberty, 25

If you’re doing something as a career, it's unfair to expect your friends for help every time, even if they have done it before. While she enjoys creating, that doesn’t mean all those around her is content. She must to respect Beth’s personal space.
Ankit, 26

Marielle might love producing videos and showing off her life publicly, but it isn't for everyone. It was kind she has assisted Beth’s career, but she needs to hear what her friend desires.
Emma, 27

It seems like you value each other, so cling to that and ensure it’s the priority in your relationship. Foster some authentic memories, where genuine feelings are preserved, not online archives. In fact, celebrities who seem to reveal their worlds actually have more privacy than it seems.
One opinion, 53

Marielle appears to be neither present nor genuine when they're together – she’s working. Each appears unsure as to what’s reasonable. The solution lies not in trying to change one another, but in each setting defined limits around what is comfortable to them and seeing if there is an acceptable compromise.
Barbara, 71

Now You Be the Judge

Consider this question: has she been exploiting their friendship?